Comments on: Your Neighbor Is An Alcoholic http://www.happinessinthisworld.com/2009/05/10/your-neighbor-is-an-alcoholic/ Reflections of a Buddhist Physician Mon, 06 Feb 2012 22:49:06 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Hilly http://www.happinessinthisworld.com/2009/05/10/your-neighbor-is-an-alcoholic/#comment-63185 Hilly Mon, 26 Sep 2011 17:18:27 +0000 http://happinessinthisworld.com/?p=320#comment-63185 My Dad said something to me one day that still rings true to now (my 10-month sobriety): "One is too many, one is not enough." I hope this helps anyone else as much as it helps me. My Dad said something to me one day that still rings true to now (my 10-month sobriety):

“One is too many,
one is not enough.”

I hope this helps anyone else as much as it helps me.

]]> By: How to Feel Better – Part 2: Expect the Best Out of People | Eva Jio http://www.happinessinthisworld.com/2009/05/10/your-neighbor-is-an-alcoholic/#comment-61656 How to Feel Better – Part 2: Expect the Best Out of People | Eva Jio Fri, 08 Jul 2011 11:52:52 +0000 http://happinessinthisworld.com/?p=320#comment-61656 [...] One nice article to read – Your Neighbor Is An Alcoholic. Filed Under: Productivity, Random Thoughts, Work [...] [...] One nice article to read – Your Neighbor Is An Alcoholic. Filed Under: Productivity, Random Thoughts, Work [...]

]]> By: Malissa http://www.happinessinthisworld.com/2009/05/10/your-neighbor-is-an-alcoholic/#comment-61436 Malissa Tue, 21 Jun 2011 21:29:47 +0000 http://happinessinthisworld.com/?p=320#comment-61436 What you wrote here really struck home for me. My husband and I are both alcoholics and stopped drinking last November due to a physical fight that ended up with him being arrested. He hasn't drunk since then, but I have on a few special occasions like our wedding...I like to tell myself that I am not addicted anymore, but I probably am. I use to feel it was a stimulant rather than a sedative, but now I feel it is a sedative when have anything to drink. I feel I can handle myself and do not need to drink by any means, but do it anyway on holidays and such. I am wondering if anyone else has been in any kind of situation like this and been okay. I am new to your blog and will continue reading it. You are a great writer. I plan to major in psy :) <blockquote><em><strong>Malissa</strong>: I know of many alcoholics who've reported that alcohol acts as a stimulant rather than a depressant, which has led me to believe that some alcoholics metabolize alcohol differently than non-alcoholics. Alcoholics do not ever get better from their disease. When they abstain for a while and then return to drinking, things often seem to go well for a while, but invariably the downward spiral begins again. The <strong>only</strong> successful way to approach alcoholism is total abstinence. If you suspect you are an alcoholic, I'd strongly suggest you be screened by a physician and that if he or she concludes you likely are (there's no blood test for alcoholism—just a survey instrument that strongly predicts the presence—or absence—of the disease), that you make a determination to abstain from drinking completely. Best of luck to you. Alex</em></blockquote> What you wrote here really struck home for me. My husband and I are both alcoholics and stopped drinking last November due to a physical fight that ended up with him being arrested. He hasn’t drunk since then, but I have on a few special occasions like our wedding…I like to tell myself that I am not addicted anymore, but I probably am. I use to feel it was a stimulant rather than a sedative, but now I feel it is a sedative when have anything to drink. I feel I can handle myself and do not need to drink by any means, but do it anyway on holidays and such. I am wondering if anyone else has been in any kind of situation like this and been okay. I am new to your blog and will continue reading it. You are a great writer. I plan to major in psy :)

Malissa: I know of many alcoholics who’ve reported that alcohol acts as a stimulant rather than a depressant, which has led me to believe that some alcoholics metabolize alcohol differently than non-alcoholics. Alcoholics do not ever get better from their disease. When they abstain for a while and then return to drinking, things often seem to go well for a while, but invariably the downward spiral begins again. The only successful way to approach alcoholism is total abstinence. If you suspect you are an alcoholic, I’d strongly suggest you be screened by a physician and that if he or she concludes you likely are (there’s no blood test for alcoholism—just a survey instrument that strongly predicts the presence—or absence—of the disease), that you make a determination to abstain from drinking completely. Best of luck to you.

Alex

]]> By: How To Overcome Shyness « Happiness in this World http://www.happinessinthisworld.com/2009/05/10/your-neighbor-is-an-alcoholic/#comment-61387 How To Overcome Shyness « Happiness in this World Sun, 19 Jun 2011 22:01:54 +0000 http://happinessinthisworld.com/?p=320#comment-61387 [...] Compassion, then, may represent the ultimate cure for shyness.  It may seem odd to imagine upon entering a room full of strangers whom we not only don’t know but have no reason to guess are even suffering, that they’re in need not only of compassion in general but of ours specifically (being, as we are, a stranger to them).  But to this I’d respond:  who isn’t struggling with something?  It may not be an enormous or cataclysmic something, but everyone hides, to some degree, a secret inner life in which they struggle on a daily basis (as I wrote about in a previous post, Your Neighbor Is An Alcoholic). [...] [...] Compassion, then, may represent the ultimate cure for shyness.  It may seem odd to imagine upon entering a room full of strangers whom we not only don’t know but have no reason to guess are even suffering, that they’re in need not only of compassion in general but of ours specifically (being, as we are, a stranger to them).  But to this I’d respond:  who isn’t struggling with something?  It may not be an enormous or cataclysmic something, but everyone hides, to some degree, a secret inner life in which they struggle on a daily basis (as I wrote about in a previous post, Your Neighbor Is An Alcoholic). [...]

]]> By: Monica http://www.happinessinthisworld.com/2009/05/10/your-neighbor-is-an-alcoholic/#comment-27479 Monica Tue, 09 Nov 2010 23:32:41 +0000 http://happinessinthisworld.com/?p=320#comment-27479 Addiction....oh yes. I know it all: the shame, the lost reputation, the lost love, the lost respect. The sickness that follows. And yet. What if the only moments of peace and happiness happen only while drinking? I quit drinking. Today I am lonely and tired. I do not love life, is something I need to put up with—not for my sake, but only not to hurt people who care for me. I do not take any pleasure in living. This was why I was drinking. What is left for me? This is ironic and hopeless. I am tranquil and silent and I know there is no answer, no reason and my only purpose anymore is to avoid hurting anybody. <blockquote><em><strong>Monica</strong>: If you are recently sober, the feelings you describe are entirely normal and to be expected. With time, you will rediscover joy in life. The process of recovery from an addiction doesn't end when you stop the addiction. It begins. Have hope. Alex</em></blockquote> Addiction….oh yes. I know it all: the shame, the lost reputation, the lost love, the lost respect. The sickness that follows. And yet. What if the only moments of peace and happiness happen only while drinking? I quit drinking. Today I am lonely and tired. I do not love life, is something I need to put up with—not for my sake, but only not to hurt people who care for me. I do not take any pleasure in living. This was why I was drinking. What is left for me? This is ironic and hopeless. I am tranquil and silent and I know there is no answer, no reason and my only purpose anymore is to avoid hurting anybody.

Monica: If you are recently sober, the feelings you describe are entirely normal and to be expected. With time, you will rediscover joy in life. The process of recovery from an addiction doesn’t end when you stop the addiction. It begins. Have hope.

Alex

]]>